This Sinner's Prayer

Psalm 51

It's scary and humbling how much baggage can creep into our lives in such a short amount of time. Just a week ago, I was finding great joy in walking with the Lord. Fast forward to now and well, I feel spiritually dead. The weight of school, homework, pharmacy...all of it is just crashing down upon my shoulders. In that time, I have subconsciously placed all of these things before God. I've gone through the motions of reading God's word each day. I did it out of duty rather than delight. It seems fitting that I ready Psalm 51 today. The last time that I read 2nd Samuel, David committed adultery and slept with Bathsheba. Psalm 51 is David's response when confronted about his actions.

So I haven't committed adultery. I haven't lied to save myself from my actions. I haven't killed a man trying to cover up my sin. But all of that aside, I am no different than King David. I have sinned against the Lord and placed my heart's desires above God's commands. I have forsaken the Lord by having idols before Him. I have strayed off of the narrow path of truth and righteousness and onto the path of destruction.

Dear God,
I feel so unworthy calling upon your name. I have sinned against you, knowing full well of what has been going on. I have let the weight of the world and trials before me get a hold on my heart. I am in need of your forgiveness. As David said, Sure I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. So create in me a pure heart. Restore to me the joy of your salvation. May I take great delight in your presence and may I cling to the rock that I know to be true. Each day, may I find my strength and hope in You. I pray that my heart will remain humble, hungry, and active knowing full well that without, I am nothing. May I seek your face and may you reveal yourself to me each day. Lord, in all things, I praise you for you alone are God and you alone are good. Thank you for this time. Thank you for hearing my cry. Amen.

Psalm 51:10-12
Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.